I Have To Be More Interesting

I've been informed that I might have a narration voice? Cool. Blogging? I honestly never thought I'd be a "blogger." It's just kind of a giant whine bag of a web site. But guess who's a hypocrite?

MMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

So. I guess I'm going to start blogging now...

What to blog about? I mean, what is the real point of a blog? Besides whining, ranting, and feeding into ones conceded nature? I guess everyone on the internet will get to know me. That's actually pretty terrifying. I'll have to be virtually anonymous; no more information than what I'd put on a greeting card for your co-worker's baby shower. Just my first name and general information, where stalkers can't find me. Ah who am I kidding. Stalkers wouldn't stalk me! I'm not interesting. I'm not even counting on one person subscribing to my blog. But hey? If I get an audience this could be the first time in history that a mass group of people are interested in what I have to say!

Well, subscribers, I'll let you get to know me. Wait, no. I can't have you be called "subscribers." That's too professional. I'll call you... Minions? Puppets? Not followers... that's cliche. I kind of like minions.

Well, MINIONS, the name's Bre. But you can call me "Dearest Overlord" for short.

I really like cats. I have cats. I like the odor of cats. I had a cat suit. Sometimes I would dress up as a cat. And Meow. As a cat. But then, I grew out of my cat suit. And resorted to growing out my body hair... and pretending to be a cat. Meow...

That was a joke.

I'm more of a dog person.

I have dry humor. It comes in handy when talking to Brits. Dark humor is also a wonderful asset to have when talking to foreigners.

I don't get the point of love letters. Yes, a long while ago they were romantic. Written with the beautiful calligraphy of a feather dipped gently in ink and gracefully drawn on a page in the light of an oil lamp. Back in the day people's feelings were foreign, and saying lines like "I live for you" or "you're my air" or "love at first sight" was unheard of, and made the unsuspecting women fall in love. But today? With the resources we have? The Hollywood references? Everything you could possibly say in a love letter has already been done. Everything magical about love has been dissolved and exposed. We don't even hand write anything anymore. I have never, and will never, receive a love letter hand written. The closest thing I'd find is probably "hey u r kool wanna go out with me on a date 2night?" in a message on facebook.

There's not a whole lot of wooing in my life.

I guess that's it for today, minions.